San Francisco must be one of the most popular cities with tourists. I'd google it, but, you know.
The famous cable cars are literally dripping with humanity, hanging off the side and filming their progress. It was like Delhi but with more knock-off Ed Hardy. My regular off-day buddy and I jumped on and were barked at by the guy cranking the handbrake (nice brown uniform, by the way, kamerade) to get all the way into the cart. Being over 6 feet tall and having to stand, I saw absolutely nothing as we chuntered along. Still, Ive done it once before and we didnt pay for it so suck it UPS guy.
After gorging ourselves we hit the harbour and hired bikes, though I was tempted to sack it off because of the aggressive style of the Eastern European touts.
Quick tip Malgorzata- when I'm at your desk with my wallet out, you don't need to shout in my face about your great rates. It's pretty clear Ive made my decision to pay 8 bucks an hour to ride your boneshaking deathmachine.
Nor do you need to shout when you're pointing out the route to the bridge. In fact just shut up. It's that big red thing over there in the distance. I'm pretty sure I'll find it. If not I'll just send up a flare and you can shout directions to me from where you are.
Anyway- if you're thinking of hiring a bike for the 2-hour bridge trip in San Francisco, don't be fooled- if you ride as hard as you can and don't stop to take a picture, you might make it in 2 hours. if you want to enjoy the experience at all, that shitty paperboy's bike is going to cost you at least 40 bucks.
Suffice to say I spent 24, I barely had time to touch the ocean, we didnt quite make it to the centre of the bridge before turning back because fuck taking the ferry back over. And the pedal finally broke on the way back down the hill. I'm also pretty sure some courier said 'go home' to me as he passed on his way to racquetball practice. Asshat.
Moaning aside, we did have a lovely wander around the Roman replica Exploratorium (or did I hear that name in an episode of South Park?) I'm pretty sure the Doors were photographed there at some point.
I'd also say that San Francisco is a beautiful city from afar- it doesn't look like an American city. Reminded me more of Marseille.
Suitably thirsty from our ride *forced march* we headed for a bar with the idea of stopping for one or two. Alas we chose a bar with 68 beers on tap and closed it about eight hours later. There was a brief respite when we went to the harbour and got crabs. That's what she said, barump-tiss!
Yep, live on the scales, cruelly boiled to death a few seconds later. I think it's the agony they go through that makes them so delicious. We also ate 16 oysters and a carton of calimari. If you're on the harbour, skip the pricey restaurants and buy off the street. I only shat liquid for the next day and a half.
To be fair that was very likely more to do with the samplers of beer. I tried at least 8 before we settled on Downtown Brown. There's a Hugh Grant joke here somewhere, surely? As bars go, Jack's is great, but I was surprised there were so many English in there. True to form they ignored the 66 other choices, settling instead on Bud or Strongbow. Everyone was very friendly anyway. One cougarish woman even over-friendly. My mate is still suffering from her backrub. But she was one of the 5 people to ask if we were a couple. No idea what gave them that impression.
The cablecar ride home was blurry but, again, free. God bless ze UPS.
2 comments:
Which one are you? Are you the skinnier one?
That would be me. It is a very tighty-whitey...
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